A sad post

Daddy-to-be and I were talking last night and he is no longer comfortable with the BLOG. He worries someone will 'figure out' who I am, and we will lose the privacy we enjoy in our lives.

Because I love and respect him, this will be my last post.

Someday

Someday I am going to get around to linking the BLOGS I read to my site. That way people can just go click on them. Two of my favorites are Hollywood and Montana, and Our Small Town Life. Oh, and I can't forget the Mad Mommy Chronicles.....that is the first BLOG I ever started reading. Emily cracks me up.

I found Hollywood and Montana through Mad Mommy Chronicles, and I found My Boring Ass Life through H&M. Kevin Smith can make any day interesting. I just wish he'd update more often.

Today I am wearing actual Maternity Jeans. And I am happy to be wearing them. I know my little one in there is safe and happy.

Sadly this morning I found a stretch mark. I called my mom to whine, but she was laughing at me so hard I ended up laughing with her. She calls them the 'mark of motherhood'.

I guess down the road there is always a tummy tuck.

The boobie fairy has come....

The boobie fairy paid me a visit recently. Holy Shit! For a fairly small butsted girl these are fun. Daddy-to-be loves them too.

I am still heartbroken for London. We love Europe...London, Italy, Ireland, Scotland---we have spent a lot of time in all these places. It is such a scary world we live in.

I watched the story of those two little kids from Idaho unfold and cried and cried when they found the little girl. I can imagine what she went through, what a horrible, horrible ordeal. It makes me want to install a tracking device on this little one when I deliver.

Olympics and Bombings

Daddy-to-be and I were really excited yesterday when London got the olympics. We decided we would get the paperwork going and we'd go to them. Then we woke up this morning to pictures of London having been attacked. They say the olympics have nothing to do with it, George Bush is in Scotland.

My heart breaks for the people of London. We have spent a lot of time there, and love the city.

A sad way to wake up.

Let Freedom Ring!!!

The fourth of July always makes me think of the movie 'The Patriot' with Mel Gibson. We fought hard for our freedom folks, lets not take it for granted.

And a big, big thanks to all the service men and women who work so hard to keep me and my freedom safe.

I salute you.

Newborns

I saw a newborn baby at my doctors office on Friday. The mom was so sweet, she let me hold him. I was suprised at how tiny he was, but he smelled so good.

I got to see my little one on the ultrasound, the little heartbeat blinking away. It made me cry and feel like a grown up all at the same time.

I also found out that there ARE baby planners out there! They call them baby nurses or something but they'll come shopping with you, and give you lessons with a doll on how to diaper, give a bath, and then they will move in with you for a few weeks when the baby is born. My mom will be here too, but I want all the help I can get.

I read online about Britneys birth plan at the hospital, or the one they are 'claiming' is her birth plan. I didn't know it was legal for them to agree to have the rooms next to hers empty, gosh I hope someone doesn't end up giving birth in the staff lounge just so Brit can have her privacy.

I love my mom

She is the best. She is a strong, beautiful vibrant woman and I can only hope to be half the mother she is.

Thats all for today....

Scary looking girls

I don't think the uber-thin actresses look good. Lindsey Lohan used to be so, so pretty. These days she looks like an anorexic barbie. And Nicole Ritchie would be so much prettier with 10 lbs added to her. But at least her face looks pretty, and classy right now. Lindsey looks like trailer trash. Just my opinion though. If you don't like it, get your own blog and say how good you think she looks.

Feel free to comment, that's what they're there for.

We are going home today, it's been a great vacation and very relaxing. But it's time to get back home and back to real life.

Baby shopping is a scary thing

I love the Sex and the City where Miranda says there should be one store that sells only one crib and it makes it easy. I totally get it now. I can't believe how much STUFF there is for someone so small. How does a person who has never had a baby know what is necessary and what is not? I'd bet someone could make a fortune if they became a 'baby planner' like a wedding planner. Guide the moms through this.

For example, something as simple as a baby bib. There are long ones, tiny ones, velcro ones, tie ones, ones that just slip over their heads, and ones that snap. How the hell are you supposed to know which ones to get?

And the nursery furniture....how much of that do you need? I don't want to hire a designer, I want to create the baby room myself but jeeze it's so overwhelming.

I've decided the best thing about being pregnant

The number one best thing about being pregnant has got to be dessert. I spent years skipping it, and the bread, all the good stuff and it was worth it to keep my ass small, but now that I can I am eating dessert again. It is heaven. I love to call room service at like midnight and get something. Daddy-to-be keeps warning me I'll get sick, but right now it is so nice.

Speaking of Daddy-to-be, again I can only thank my lucky stars that I found him. Such an amazing man, talented, caring, we can talk for hours on anything from Politics to fashion trends of the 80's. I never thought I would be so lucky in my life as to find someone like him.

I didn't date much growing up, but I did have a couple of good boyfriends that I run into now and again. Daddy-to-be though, has dated a lot. We run into his old girlfriends more often and there is one who just does not like me. She and I have spoken twice......and they'd been broken up for a long time before we met but she just doesn't like me. I am such a dork, I just want her to. But it's never going to happen.

Big thanks to the commenter who turned me onto Spellcheck! Somehow I missed that button.

VH1's 100 Greatest Child Stars

I am luuuuuuuving this show. I grew up watching most of these shows. I was a little taken aback by #100, Candace Cameron who said she will never return to work full time because she knows that the bible wants her to put mothering and raising her children first. But if she is happy, that is great. I'm not judging, just suprised someone would feel that comfortable with their faith as to say that on camera.

See, religion in hollywood is interesting. Kaballa is celebrated (did I ever mention I wish blogger.com had spellcheck? I am the worlds most awful speller) and Scientology is questioned, but faith in other forms is rarely mentioned. And if you do speak out about it, people (like myself) are suprised and think it's gutsy.

Speaking of Scientology......Tom Cruise.....I love you man, but back off the post pardom depression thing. Until you've gone through it, don't judge how women get help. I give big 'atta girls' to Brooke Shields for writing and pubilishing that book and going public. She probablly helped so many women by doing that. And if they need medication to feel better, it is not for you to judge.

Consuming thoughts

All right.....so I know I'm not the first woman to ever get pregnant but it is just amazing to me how my body is changing, and I find myself talking and talking about it. I'm sure some of my friends are sick of it. It is hard when your friends don't have kids. They don't understand how much you want to talk about it/them. And they seem to understand that I won't go to clubs with them (secondhand smoke much) but they have yet to offer to do something 'pregnancy friendly'. I'm wondering if this is how you end up losing touch with people.

I'm jealous, because I read a blog about a mom and she was having her second oldest friend come over to visit and the kids were going to play and they were just going to visit. I want to meet other moms I can do that with. But with my 'job', I have to keep this guard up because inviting someone from Yoga over could be someone who is perfectly willing to sell photos to one of the tabloid rags out there. And they make cameras pretty small these days.

I just saw the photos of Denise Richards with her girls, what an inspiration. She looks beautiful and so happy to be a mom. I wish I could just call her up and say 'Denise....will you be my mommy friend?'

One of those days

Did you ever have one of those days when life seems so good, you are so happy you just can't wipe the smile off your face? I love this feeling, the feeling that nothing bad can happen, that I can tackle anything and it will all work out.

I bought my first baby outfit! It is adorable. We've been talking too about finding out what the baby is, and I think we're going to wait until the delivery room. I have a feeling I might need that extra encouragement to push the baby out.

I also have been reading about 4D ultrasounds. The pictures show exactly what your baby is going to look like. What is the fun in that? Isn't part of the fun of having a new baby sitting with your guy and looking at who the baby got it's eyes, nose, ears from etc? I'm not sure what kind of machine my doctor has, but I hope it isn't one of those.

Feeling better

I am feeling a little better. My guy took me for a romantic day yesterday and it was just what I needed.

I love hotel maids. Long ago I worked as one and was always treated as garbage. If people know what these folks had to put up with they would be so much nicer. I always try to say thank you when they come into the room. I guess I am more well known than I thought because one of them today could quote me back lines from a former character. She knew them better than I did. Gave me reason to smile.

Zits are the pits

I am so broken out! I have not been this broken out since 9th grade. Even on my back and shoulders. Disgusting.

Plus, I am having a serious gas problem. My guy is being nice enough not to give me a hard time but it's not like he can't tell.

I just feel ugly and smelly today.

Angelina Jolie

There are very few girls that I would 'turn' for (if you get my drift). But at the top of the list is Angelina Jolie. Something about that woman just calls to me I guess.

Spooning

There is something great to be said about spooning. Waking up with your guys arms around you, feeling so safe and secure. It's a great start to the day.

Today I am going shopping and will end up getting more than I need, but isn't that the fun of shopping? Plus, I'll admit, I love having salespeople wait on me. You know, the snotty ones from the movie Pretty Woman? Well, they are around, trust me. And I am one of those girls who can spot them at 20 paces. This is bitchy, but I love to spend a couple of hours in the store letting the older, more agressive (read:bullying) salespeople push out the nicer, more relaxed ones. Then I'll chat up the nicest girl in the store and let her ring me up. Serves the catty ones right.

Off now to go have some breakfast. I miss my morning espresso, but doc says no more. So I will make due with juice and a kiss from my guy.

A former commenter

I just wanted to say I did read the comments, and I will think about what you said. I'm guessing you're more popular than I am, and I do feel bad for your children if they go through that on a daily basis.

Favortite Words

When I was little at the dinner table my dad used to ask me what my favorite word was that day. It got us talking about why and what had happened. It's a game I still play with myself.

Today my favorite words are either 'room service' or 'spa treatments'. I love to go and get pampered. Seaweed wraps sound pretty nasty but you leave feeling incredible.

My guy and I though it would be really romantic to get a 'couples' massage, where you both go in and the room is all lit with candles and there is soft music. And it was great. The only problem was when it was done we were too relaxed to have sex! We ended up just laying on the bed watching tv.

Bit the bullet

I leave today so I got on the scale to find out my weight. My obgyn is a great gal who doesn't tell me what I weigh unless I ask, she says why add stress. You've gotta love that.

So far I am up 5 lbs......EEK! What to Expect when you are expecting says its due to increased blood volume, but I think it may have more to do with my eating habits of late. I need to nip that one in the bud.

I am still not showing. I have been told it can take 16 weeks with you first. It's hard, because I want to show but I don't want to wear maternity clothes. They just seem so frumpy. A friend promised to take me to 'A Pea in the Pod' and show me the cute maternity clothes. Maybe I will find something cute in my travels.

Any suggestions from readers?

Big Fat Toes

My feet are swelling up. They are pretty gross. Thank god for warm weather and thongs. I also got one of these http://www.intheswim.com/Pool-Floats-Toys-and-Sports/Floating-Chairs-Lounges/Standard-Floating-Pool-Lounge/
and it is sooooooo nice. I forsee a lot of lounging around in the pool this summer.

I am getting ready to go on vacation for two weeks. I am not sure how much internet access I will have but I will try to BLOG in as I can. Wish me fun in the sand and sun!

I love the Ocean

The ocean is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. I'm not one for hanging out on the beach, but a day on a boat in the middle of the water is amazing. When you can't see anyone around you for miles, and you can just relax and enjoy the calm. I love to swim and float and hopefully see some animals.

Luckily so far the rocking of the waves does not apperar to upset my tummy or little baby bean inside there. In fact, I am feeling great.

Books to Read

I have never been a huge reader, but I read "The Girlfriends Guide to Pregnancy" cover to cover last night. It was so funny, and scared me at the same time. A girlfriend told me I need to read Jenny McCarthys baby book too. I think I'll send my assistant to get that one for me.

Assistants are a wonderful thing. They are not just your employees, but they are also not your friends. If you can find one you trust, they are worth their weight in gold. Can you imagine the tabloid frenzy if a big time Hollywood A-lister was in Walgreens buying a pregnancy test? However, ask your handy dandy assistant to go grab you one and no-one is the wiser.

A good assistant is hard to keep because eventually, they want their own life. TV studios and movie sets sound filled with glamour, but in reality there is a lot of sitting around, watching TV and waiting to be called. You can be on set for 3 months, and your assistant will get lonely for their family, their significant other, and I really don't blame them. I have lost my last 2 assistants due to my traveling.

Pregnancy wise I'm feeling pretty good. I'm keeping up with my hikes and allowing myself to eat foods I haven't touched in years.

Weight Gain and Hollywood

Women in Hollywood are supposed to wait until a certain 'point' in their career to have kids. And when you do you are supposed to gain 12 lbs, all in your tummy, work out with a personal trainer everyday and be back to your size 0 no more than 2 weeks after the baby is born.

To heck with that. Actresses are real women. Yeah, some still work out during their pregnancy.....Gabby Reece looked fantastic at the end, and some look great not working out. But some say to hell with it and they just enjoy eating 'real' foods and they put on weight. I will always love Kate Hudson after she gave an interview and said she gained 60 lbs, was the happiest fat lady out there, and that it bothered the people around her much more than her. I'm sure it did, I'm sure her agent and next director were calling daily to see how quickly she was losing the weight.

Anyone remember Catherine Zeta Jones at the Oscars? She looked stunning, and was about ready to pop. And to her face everyone told her she looked 'radient', and behind her back they couldn't believe how much weight she had 'packed on'. I would bet she gained only about 35 lbs.

So as tough skinned as you have to be in Hollywood, you have to be even tougher to be pregnant in hollywood. Am I thick skinned enough? We shall see. I admit to crying more than once already from something someone has said....but luckily my guy is awesome and supportive and loves me to bits.

Tired, tired, tired

I feel as though I could fall asleep while typing this. No matter how much sleep I get I am still tired all day long. Going to the grocery store or Starbucks is a huge ordeal. Now, before you all get snippy in my face about Starbucks my doctor approved a certain amount of caffine each day so back off. Sorry if I sound cranky, I'm just so tired.

I had to pull out of a movie that I really, really wanted to do. But the part just wouldn't work with a 6 month pregnant girl and that is how far along I will be when they start filming. Good parts don't come around often. Some directors are willing to work around it, some will work it into the script, some just rip up your headshot and move along to the next girl.

I suppose in some ways I am incredibly lucky. What I have done so far with my acting pays me more than it should, and I won't have to worry about paying for anything. I refuse to be one of those moms who only dresses her baby in designer clothes though. And yes, I will be able to afford a nanny and yes, I will get one. With both mom and dad being actors, we'll need an extra hand around.

The sun is almost up so I think I am going to go for a walk. I used to work out daily, now a walk in the hills is about all I can do. I wonder how much weight I will gain. Good subject for tomorrows blog.....pregnancy weight gain and hollywood.

Just peed on a stick

I recently found out I am pregnant. While my guy and I are happy, hollywood is not. I have been told by no less than 6 people (producers, directors, agents....all people I considered friends) to get rid of the baby. My career is on a fast track.....movies are finally happening....why mess it up for a baby?

I was nice enough not to kick their asses. This is hollywood after all, and if you are smart you never burn bridges. I just smiled and said I am keeping the baby.

Now the backstabbing begins. Who will leak it to the press? Will I be as hounded as Britney? Will my tummy be photographed and put in tabloids to speculate?

Hollywood is plastic. You can't share your thoughts with anyone without seeing them in print the next day. That is why I decided to do a blog. I can share my thoughts with honesty, and not be judged for them. Check back to share in my journey.